INTARVIEW
WITH LEVELORD OF RITUAL ENTARTAINMENT
BY
JEFF K,!!!!!!!!!!
page
Threee
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IT
SI A PRESENT TO REMEMBAR WHEN YUO MEET SANTA LEVERLORD~
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JEFF K!!! -
no all teh props and comics from SURVIVORIRVIROR
went to chariety we printed them out and decorated Jerrys
clubhouse with them too covar up the smell
Levelord
- Jerry Rubenstein? You know him?
JEFF K!!! -
no
Levelord
- Hey, I know this is a kid's show, but can I go grab a fucking
cigarette? I'm fucking jonesing over here!
JEFF K!!! -
FINE
Levelord
- Maybe you can think of a funny question or two while I'm
gone, yes? This is worse than an interview with fricken Stomped!
JEFF K!!! -
YUO ARE A LYIAR!!!!
NOTHING IS WORSE THAN STOMPED
Levelord
- Okay, okay, you're right.
JEFF K!!! -
go smoke yuor crack
Levelord
- What if I have to piss during this interview?
JEFF K!!! -
THATS WHAT MISTAR ATKINS IS FOR
Levelord
- I don't smoke crack! You have that all wrong and I hate
you because of all the emails I get. Mom wasn't very happy
when that all came out, too!
You don't have
any you want to sell, do you?
JEFF K!!! -
MARREY CHRISMAS
HOW
MUCH of yuor day do yuo spend tryiung to put boobs in maps???
99%?
Levelord
- Most of the day is spent thinking about putting boobs in
everything, even other boobs, but unfortunately Fat Cat American
Puritans, Inc. won't let me actually do that.
JEFF K!!! -
will yuor MSRP rating go down?!?
Levelord
- Exactly! And Grandma will go down, too, if I ever put boobs
in a level!
JEFF K!!! -
why are all mapmakars HORNY SEX PEOPAL?
Levelord
- Now there is a good question! Okay, yes indeed, we actually
have entrance exam to make sure all our level designers are
sexually frustrated. Most, like me, are still virgins, too.
We mix them with
the artists once they are hired. The combination of pent-up
sexual desires, mixed with the perversion and abnormalities
of the artists make for the best environments. That's a trade
secret, BTW, and noone has ever thought to ask before. You
are the shit!
JEFF K!!! -
I once intarviewed CHARLUIE WEEDENHOFFER from 3D reams and
he was liek MISTAR HONRY MAN teh intarview was liek:
ME:
"So what gaem do yuo likes?'
CHARLIE:
"NAKED 12 YEAR OLDS"
ME:
"charlie ples stop, yuo will make my MSRP drop!!! and kids
wont be abel to reads my siet!"
CHARLIE:
"I WANT TOO HAEV SEX WITH 2 YEAR OLDS"
Levelord
- 12 is okay, but they tend to scream alot and then they tell
their parents, THAT aint cool... now 17, that's the shit!
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