JUST PUNCHING AND KICKING AND TEARING SHIT UP LIKE MAD

Winter in a Nutshell with Tom "Moof" Davies

Livestock: moof, do you know that winter is coming
Moof: i read a good book once
Moof: where winter was coming
Moof: it is called hard boiled wonderland and the end of the world
Livestock: do you know what winter means
Moof: what
Livestock: soon the majestic eagle will fly south for the winter
Livestock: it will fly with its friends in a star formation
Livestock: under fighter jet escort
Livestock: and it will wait in mexico
Livestock: for the return of summer
Moof: you cant fly
Livestock: i didn't say i was flying
Livestock: do you ever listen to me moof
Livestock: DO YOU EVER LISTEN
Moof: in mexico it is always spring :)
Livestock: yes that's true
Livestock: that's why the eagles go there for winter
Livestock: some of them take parrot wives
Livestock: and produce children
Livestock: but their colors are not red white and blue
Moof: tell me
Moof: what colors are they
Livestock: well mostly like bright colors
Livestock: but with some brown feathers okay
Moof: okay
Livestock: to be honest i'm not an ornithologist
Moof: are you serious
Livestock: yes
Moof: you are taking me for a fool and let me tell you
Moof: i am no fool
Moof: just as you
Moof: are no ornithologist
Livestock: well yeah i never said i was
Livestock: i was just talking about winter really
Moof: winter is like a month in a planet of dinosaurs
Livestock: why do you say that
Moof: because my friend the dinosaurs eat the trees, the trees do not eat the dinosaurs
Moof: sometimes dinosaurs eat each other but i have never seen a tree eat a tree
Moof: just as winter
Moof: eats our souls
Moof: like a hungry tree feasting upon the bark of its brother
Livestock: mostly it just gets cold though
Livestock: i don't know about that other stuff
Moof: in peru june is winter
Livestock: they call snow the mitochondria of the winter
Moof: no one does that
Livestock: well i do
Moof: you always were special
Livestock: well that's all there is to say about winter
Moof: winter is when i take the bodies to the lake because by the time the snow thaws no trace will be left
Livestock: what bodies moof
Moof: what
Livestock: you live in arizona, what do you know about winter anyway?
Moof: it is forever autumn in my heart
Livestock: and yet how is there a harvest if there is never a spring
Moof: who harvests in spring
Moof: seriously
Moof: harvest is in autumn
Moof: it is always harvest
Livestock: i know but what the hell do you harvest
Livestock: IF THERE WAS NEVER A SPRING
Livestock: i mean WHEN DID YOU PLANT THE SEEDS
Moof: YOU DON'T PLANT SEEDS YOU JUST HARVEST THEM ETERNALLY
Livestock: that's the biggest bunch of crap i've ever heard
Livestock: your heart isn't always autumn, is it?
Moof: yes it is
Moof: well
Livestock: prove it
Moof: not literally
Livestock: well see you should have said that
Moof: i couldn't have said "metaphorically, it is forever autumn in my heart"
Moof: that would have been ridiculous!
Livestock: well if you had said that we wouldn't have had to get course with each other
Moof: do you mean course or coarse
Livestock: i didn't mean "course" literally okay
Moof: i think you meant to say coarse
Livestock: i think you meant to shut up
Moof: i think you meant to drive a boat off a waterfall into a rock
Livestock: do you mean figuratively or literally
Moof: literally of course
Livestock: well i don't own a boat so you must mean figuratively
Moof: no i want you to buy one
Livestock: well i have a lot on my plate right now so a boat is just out of the question
Moof: i am sorry
Livestock: and besides it is winter so the water will be frozen
Moof: your head will be frozen in a minute!!
Livestock: you're cold as ice, moof

Oh, wait, that one is too long. Forget I posted it.

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)