A sampling of classified ads clipped from the pages of the Rapture Standard, the finest underwater newspaper in the world.
Horrible earth-shattering apocalypse be damned! The Capital Wasteland is still alive and teeming with commerce, trade, and gainful employment.
FREE: MILLIONS OF AMMO CASINGS! A miracle of nature! My backpack has somehow accumulated what must be at least ten million completely weightless ammo casings. You can have them all as soon as you come get them from my pack, which I hid inside a scorpion den for obvious reasons. Good luck!
ANYBODY LOSE AN OLD GUY? I recently got lost inside the Strip and found myself in this weird computer room with a 300-year old mummy dude mumbling inside a giant plastic dildo. Might be somebody's grandpa? The guy won’t shut up about snow globes and it’s driving me crazy. Free with proof of ownership.
ATTN: Dark Brotherhood. Just got new hardwood flooring installed that I don’t want to bloody up performing the Black Sacrament. Anyways, could you kill the Dragonborn? He put a pot on my head and stole all my cabbages that I was saving up for a big feast.
FREE COLLEGE DEGREE - The College of Winterhold is accepting new students for its famous magic program. Interested candidates should simply show up and receive free room and board and education. We’re so eager to start blasting magic all over the place that we won’t even bother asking your name.
A collection of ads from Columbia, the setting of Bioshock: Infinite.
MURDERERS APPLY - Join the most ruthless and ill-defined group in the Commonwealth. We Gunners aim to kill and occupy the whole dang wasteland. All applicants shot on sight, so come prepared to die.
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