A Journey Through the Heart, submitted by Alex. As I'm sure you could tell by the preceding article, I am actually hallucinating from a fever, and I don't mean Jungle Fever or Prize Fever. It is with great sorrow that I must inform you that this site is not a terrifying phantom conjured by the deepest recesses of my boiling brain, it is in fact a real site. Inept and bland design fused with inept and disturbing poetry to create a horrifying vision of hell. A very inept hell.
The crow and the craven,
Attacked me the raven,
While sitting in my haven,
And all the lights were dim,
So I never really saw him...
If that picture didn't scare you enough, he also has a picture of himself brandishing a pump-action shotgun. Based on these two pieces of photographic evidence I'm not sure what he does when he gets mad, shoot their head or eat their head. He also appears to be stalking his boyish girlfriend. Good lord I wish it were a hallucination.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.