Boruff-Davies Requirements for a Perfect Barn (1st Edition, 2007)

Livestock: moof i think maybe we should come up with a list of elements that define the perfect barn, and we can then publish this list for cash monies
Livestock: i will start
Livestock: -contains hay
Livestock: -inviting to hogs and horses
Moof: -owl's nest in rafters
Livestock: -a fresh coat of red paint on the exterior
Moof: -broken down tractor rusting in the corner
Livestock: -an escaped chain gang convict fast asleep in some hay
Livestock: -a place for ducks to shelter when the weather turns sour
Moof: -secrets hidden in the dirt wrapped in a bag under the old pig pen
Moof: livestock when i was little my dad would build us forts out of straw bales in the barn :)
Moof: some of them were multi-storied
Livestock: -some hooks and mounts for hanging tools
Livestock: your dad was okay i guess
Moof: -a nice quiet corner for hens to lay eggs
Livestock: is this a barn or a henhouse
Livestock: be realistic
Moof: have you ever even been in a barn
Livestock: of course i've been in a barn they are big and opulent
Moof: livestock we have 2 barns and many sheds
Moof: there is only one barn left because we knocked the big asbestos one down :)
Moof: sometimes as a child i would play in that barn, and grind the asbestos down into dust and breathe it in for fun
Livestock: i think one day i might like to have a barn of my own
Moof: we can raise one
Livestock: would it be wrong
Livestock: for two men to raise a barn
Moof: i dont care what society thinks
Livestock: i think barn should probably have wifi as well

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)

More Mooflogs

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.



    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful