The Vein: Hold on Hank, we're just getting word now that the ceremonial bats have been released, marking the start of the competition!
Haymaker: Those bats were of course provided by Bruce's Rent-A-Bat Bazaar. Bruce's Bats: prices so low you'll think we've guano off the deep end!
The Vein: We're being told that Gryknarl has just finished up his pregame prayers and offerings to Lord Satan and started his traditional no-peeking count to 666, while our human competitors get the regulation opening head start. Looks like they've come up to a rockslide -
Haymaker: Uh oh Vein, looks like he blew his load of Hide and Plastique(tm) caving C4 a little early there - classic mistake, hope that doesn't come back to bite them in the juicy bits later.
The Vein: Couldn't agree more, Hank. As even the most casual caving enthusiast will tell you, high-yield plastic explosives are a crucial part of any expedition, and these guys really blew it.
Haymaker: Did you just recycle the corny joke I made not even 3 seconds ago?
The Vein: Not in the eyes of the law or this coffee mug full of moonshine I've been pretending is water.
Haymaker: Hey, I'll drink to that!
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Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
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