Ask Emily: 02-05-2003

Samsunga,So u've already thank of suicide? Truly ur life is been muy shitty. U only 15, so u have no need think of suicide yet, but u live in Brazil and is poor and that make people thank of suicide aplenty, let me told u. U also bisexual so u like put ur peepee in holes in boys and girls, but you 15, so u might not know all about sex yet. Wait until u did grew up some and then see how u feel.Ok, that was getting pretty annoying. I don't doubt that English is your second language, but I strongly suggest some sort of lessons in grammar and such. Maybe there's someone else around you who is also poor so they won't charge you a lot of money or something. Maybe you can take grammar lessons in exchange for doing some sort of work grubbing about in the dirt or whatever it is that poor people in Brazil do to grow food. In any case, your speaking abilities are not going to be a big hit with the gents or the ladies, and although it doesn't solve your problems it might help you out a bit and increase your self-confidence if you knew how to communicate well. I know that I'm somewhat of a grammar nazi and that I am also a hypocrite because my grammar is really quite flawed in a lot of places (I am the queen of run-on sentences), but your use of "ur" instead of "your" rather got under my skin. Ok, enough about that.That stuff being said, you really are very young. You have some bisexual tendencies and it's good that you are exploring your sexuality at a young age (obviously I don't have to tell you to be careful and all of that). When you do grow up it will be an excellent asset to know exactly how you feel about yourself and to what extent you are attracted to both genders. I say this because I know a lot of people in their mid to late 20's who are just now figuring out that they have been attracted to their own gender for however long and it usually fucks them up in the head to realize that they have wanted to bone their friends for a long time. In any case, just figuring out that you are bisexual isn't really enough. You are looking for a mature relationship that will help you and your partner grow as people as well as allowing the two of you to explore your sexualities together.I don't really know what you mean when you ask whether bisexual people should have more options. Sure you have options to a certain extent because you can date and have sex with people of either gender. That's a hell of an option. In terms of finding people, it's a tricky situation for someone who is young and gay, but if I were you I'd try to be a little patient and understand that you probably won't meet someone with whom you can have an ideal relationship until you are a lot older and more mature. In the mean time there is no problem with your dating and figuring out what it is that makes you happy in a partner, but especially if you have to keep your bisexuality a secret from people you will be unable to fully explore your options until you have more personal freedom and more maturity to work with. You are only 15, for fuck's sake. You're a kid. Enjoy your childhood while you can and don't rush into the chaotic world of dating and relationships any faster than you absolutely have to. When you do get there you will find that you are a better person for having used more discretion and that you have a lot more to offer a partner.

Poor guy. Get it? He's poor.

Hey there soldier d00d,If I were you I'd adopt a rule for your conduct over yonder that would ensure your personal safety to the best of my ability. This rule would basically state that in any situation wherein there were people of any other than American persuasion even within vague proximity to myself, I would shoot them. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? You shoot one of those Arab people and they get even more pissed off at Americans, woopty shit. They will most likely be turned into dead people soon anyway by the grand old US of A #1, so you'd really just be cutting to the chase and saving them from the misery of seeing their families starve and die before them. You shoot a Frog from Frenchieland and everyone will applaud. You'll get medals and they'll name schools after you. You shoot someone from Italy and they will tell you that you will never be allowed to eat pasta again and that maybe you will have some guys show up at your house to kill you. No biggie smalls, that pasta shit is bad for you anyway and you would escape dying in the Middle East and having your body eaten or whatever those crazy people do over there. You probably won't mistake anyone from Britain or Germany as being an enemy, so those are the only real possibilities! You'll be fine. So the strategy you need to employ is simply to shoot at will whenever someone approaches you who you suspect of not being loyal to Uncle Sam and the team here in the Home of the Free.But you are an enlisted soldier in this man's army, so you have duties to perform. If you follow orders, wear your helmet, and survive your smallpox vaccination, you are doing just about everything that you can do. Don't drink the water, don't have sex with the women, and avoid breathing in any clouds of odd-colored air and you'll probably make it out without a scratch. Probably. Or you might die.

So long, sucka.