PsychicToaster

As a blood mage, I've always found it difficult to maintain relationships with my peer group. It's hard to maintain a work-life balance when the only way I can succeed is to draw on the life force of others. Do I go out for drinks with Kevin, or do I put my sacrificial dagger through his chest cavity to drain him of his blood for my Friday night ritual? People often ask why I can't just use my own blood for spellcasting, to which my only reply is "it wouldn't work." They don't really "get" me sometimes.

I tried just making small cuts on people's shoulders or necks, but the results were usually chastisement and anger. It's much easier to kill them entirely to spare me the headache of explaining myself.

Can I make the transition to Wizard? It sounds like a lifestyle of not carving up your friends and family to further your career is much more fulfilling. I've had zero luck summoning the Blood Lord and the cult is quite displeased with my lack of progress. Maybe being able to wear a white shirt/magnificent robe for once would bring me happiness.

Jukeboxblues

I had a good friend once who was a blood mage. He would always feel guilty about using other peoples blood to fuel his magic so he ended up setting a little shop up where people could donate their blood to him in jars. I lost touch with him shortly after this. Steve I think his name was. Good fellow. He's an accountant now.

Fart Puzzle

Rogue here, catching up on the thread. So just because I use my magic to conjour shadows and stab people in the back I'm lumped in with fighters? Wow, you'd think the wizard community would be a little bit more tolerant of fellow magic users. I expect to catch the ire of fighters, but we have all gone through the same struggle of coming out!

Just this week I've saved a thurmatage, an enchantress, and a red wizard from brigands in the alley behind the tavern, and you would say I am not worthy of the term wizard?!

The Goatfather

one of those "rogue lives matter" protesters tried to sneak in again, but get this: his sign was spelled "rouge." lol typical

Applewhite

What do you call a fighter too cowardly and weak to face his enemy in the daylight?
A: a rogue.

Dr Cheeto

LMAO you paladins are all the same. I'll be here when you need a trap disarmed.

Blizzy_Cow

Aw look at the paladin mad jelly of a rogue's ability to be fast as fuck and not be encumbered by lame ass armour

Applewhite

It's not an encumbrance if you have upper body strength.

Blizzy_Cow

Whats that gonna do when a wizard turns your armour red hot and cooks you alive homie

Applewhite

I have magic too, and I would cast a cooling spell.

Plus my armor is blessed with runes.

les fleurs du mall

haha it mustve been a really powerful sorcerer who cast "Charm of Unending Nerd Shit" on this thread

Jukeboxblues

Yeah, I am a pretty big deal.

Thanks to Jukeboxblues and the Goons for being courageous enough to have this conversation!

– Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller

More Comedy Goldmine

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.

  • DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful