From: "Michael Meredith"
To: Tyler
Subject: Re: MOM! DAD! Parent Alert! Warning!To answer your question. The best policy is to stay drug free and teach your children likewise. That is the intent of our program. I have included research information within the program to give parents a reasonalble amout of information and the resource locations where they can search to their hearts desire and find the real answers to all of their questions.
Mick
From: Tyler
To: "Michael Meredith"
Subject: Re: MOM! DAD! Parent Alert! Warning!
Mick,
The worst has happened.
As I write these letters my hands still tremble from shock. I hardly know what to say.
You remember I told you about our two alligators, Pak and Chooie. Well, they escaped from their new owners the other day and found their way back to our place. I guess they missed their old home.
Our son found them before we could and I guess they must have attacked. He died in the hospital last night.
So, needless to say, we won't be needing one of your kits. Best of luck in your future endeavors.
Tyler
–
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Our Something Awful email pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these email pranks are all - unfortunately - real.
