This article is part of the HYURGI TIGERWOODS series.
Welcome to MAFIARAVE 2019 it is #1 outdoor rave club in woods of Odessa brought to you in UKRAINE for one month only by party master HYURGI TIGERWOODS!!!!!
#1 PARTY PLANNER of ZHELEZNOGORSK AND #2 IN ALL OF KRASNOYARSK KRAI!!!
Help plan famous "FYRE FESTIVAL" by computer geniuses.
Joint forces with
MONEY GENIUS of UKRAINE Igor Fruman and Lev Parnas and LEGITIMATE BUSINESS called FRAUD GUARANTEE!!!
"WHEN FRAUD IS NEED ONE DAY NO WAIT!! FRAUD IS GUARANTEE!!!!!!!
Come to outdoor woods in beautiful Odessa country. Listen to good music by favorite DJ like DJ Great Times and DJ Best Music. #1 DJ of America "DJ ROBERT USA MUSIC"
SIGN UP NOW FOR FREE $$$AUSAGE IN BAG
RAVE IS ON GOAT PASSAGE ROUTE: Goats will come through rave two times so see goats but do not fight them GOATS WILL WIN BATTLE
CELEBRITY RAVE GUEST: Rudi Giuluuluaiani he will DEMONSTRATE TEETH
YES FIERCEST GOATS IN OBLAST!!!!!
Enjoy fresh air and bathroom where possible. DANGER: IF FRIEND FALL INTO LATRINE TRENCH DO NOT CLIMB IN TO RESCUE TELL TRENCH WARDEN
Terrifying orthodox priest he is so old!!! At a rave? Yes. Bless this mess.
Trash on ground. Party like USA raccoon!!! Garbage is waste and waste is stompt to oblivion farewell. Broke bottle,
paper, cigarette rinds, vestiges, vials.
KETTLEBELLS 100 kettlebells all weights all sizes for pitiful weakling up to uranium level man of power, throw them swing them rave with them (THE PLEASURE IS 100%!!!) Your strength is going up with rave.
Gun we have gun for you if you do not bring gun MAFIAGUN 7.62mm Kalashnikov, Makarov, Dragunov, SKS and yes WE HAVE BOMB. Rave is TIERONE.
You like pretty girl? Some girls over here. MAFIAGIRLS are beautiful with strong faces and buxom. Implants. Good teeth and strong for pulling cart.
KIDS WELCOME! We have lite vodka for children as well as kids guns and lesser bomb. FREE BREAD FOR KIDS UNDER 8.
Favorite DJ of Chelyabinsk "DJ ROWDY RAMBUNCTIOUS" and "KING DJ PIMP" here to play raps.
Actual bear "PETROV" is loose and trained to not bite through skull but do not test limit of training SOME LINES NOT TO CROSS WITH BEAR: honey, yelling, loud music
EXCITE BEAR to fury
If you see Hyurgi, say HYURGI! He is here for your pleasure especially pleasure of ladies. He will dance with you.
OPEN WIFI 100% FREE Internet hook up your phone to internet public and free no hackers or viruses or room full of guys waiting to copy over all of your text messages into a file and then use info to get into bank "Garantee"
COME NOW!!!!!
NOTICE: Police have been paid not coming for two days this means also if too much drugs we are in NO POLICE zone so you will die from drugs.
–
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
Previous Articles
- EXCLUSIVE: A More Deeper Look at the PlayStation 5
- Flu Season is Here to Finally Free the Fortunate From This Hell
- An Email From the Front Line of the Second American Civil War
- Mr. President, It May Be Time to Call Upon Saudi Arabia to Use Their Orb
- For My Money, I Spit On Your Grave 23 Is Where The Franchise Began To Lose Steam
Suggested Articles
About this series
Russia's #1 strong man and his extended family have various things they want to sell you.
Other articles in this series
- 1. KETTLEBELLS!
- ...
- 3. UNIVERSITY!
- 4. PC-COP!
- 5. GORSKFUNDR: FUND PROJECT!
- 6. FITNESS SECRETARY!
- 7. MAFIARAVE!!!
