SkyMall Product Reviews: Enormous African Elephant

This article is part of the SkyMall Product Reviews series.

Attract crowds by creating an African savanna of your very own with our life-sized, almost 8 foot tall replica of the world's largest living terrestrial animal! Our savanna elephant is authentically sculpted from its large, ruffled ears that fan the breeze to its stabilizing trunk that trumpets a grand entrance in the wild. Cast in quality designer resin by skilled artisans who've captured the texture of both hide and tusk, our animal statue hand-painted in naturalistic hues.

Customer Review:
By Yardboss from Atlanta, GA

At $9,495.00 this is an outstanding value. This isn't the first giant animal statue I've bought, and it sure as hell won't be the last. I wish SkyMall sold more large animal replicas. Aside from this, the only other large scale animals are a triceratops and bigfoot, and frankly those don't fit the theme I've got going in my front yard. Doesn't mean I can't get 'em for the backyard, though. I will.

Age: 46-50

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Customer Rating:
By PeeingMan from Wherever I Want

Well, it's here. What am I supposed to do with it now? The instructions don't say much, and as far as I can tell it just stands there. Why did I buy this again? I thought this was for something, or supposed to do something.

Age: 31-35

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Customer Rating:
By The Randman from Sandpoint, ID

Product contains no functional orifices, no genitalia. If you bought this expecting it to be usable, you're as big a sucker as me. Talk about a rude awakening.

Age: 51-55

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Customer Rating:
By Hep from Cedar Rapids, IA

Tusks are not made of real ivory, don't be fooled. Skin is also not authentic. I thought I was ordering genuine taxidermy, and not some stupid child's toy. I don't need a fake elephant. There is literally no reason to own a fake elephant. I wanted a stuffed elephant and SkyMall sends me a load of dung. This is my second to last transaction ever, SkyMall. After the next product I buy, I will buy no more from you again.

Age: 41-45

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Customer Rating:
By Pamala from Bismarck, ND

No substitute for the real thing.

Age: 36-40

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Customer Rating:
By Gus from Wichita, KS

Impossible to move! I bought this and the delivery crew left it on my driveway. It's over 500 pounds and I can't move that on my own and now I can't park my car. It's just there taunting me. Now I'm the idiot with the elephant in the driveway. It's supposed to in my backyard with the rest of my statues.

Age: 41-45

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Customer Rating: Customer Review:
By Mort from Austin, TX

Good enough!

Age: 46-50

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Customer Rating: Customer Review:
By FuturamaFry from Madison, WI

Very scary! Did anyone else think Cthulhu? Like, whoa, crazy tentacle and horns, dude. This is definitely some kind of monster straight out of Lovecraft.

Age: 26-30

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Customer Review:
By ExcitedGus from Sente Fe, NM

This is literally the absolute perfect addition to my tar pit. It's been driving me nuts seeing that tar pit sit empty all these years. Thank you SkyMall. Now I can start having ladies over to the place again.

Age: 41-45

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Customer Rating:
By MommyBlogging4Christ from Kokomo, IN

Bought this for my child who has recently become obsessed with elephants. Unfortunately, he found this statue to be terrifying. Frankly, I'm not even sure elephants are even in the Bible, so I think this may be some kind of offensive fantasy creature. My husband is renting a backhoe so we can dig a pit to bury it in. My son is very excited to "punish the monster." God's judgment will be wonderful.

Age: 31-35

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)