SkyMall Product Review: Bark Deterring Ultrasonic Collar

This article is part of the SkyMall Product Reviews series.

This is the patented collar that uses ultrasonic sound to humanely restore peace and quiet for those vexed by a dog's nuisance barking. When a dog barks while wearing this collar, a built-in microphone detects the sound, causing the unit to emit a harmless high-pitched tone -- inaudible to humans -- that startles the animal into silence.

Customer Review:
By SmallDogLover from Tuscaloosa, AL

DO NOT USE ON DOGS BELOW 8 POUNDS. We put it on our tiny little delicate joke of a dog, so gentle that a moth could bruise its precious skin. The high-pitched tone that followed its ceaseless yapping caused its fragile head to explode all over my lap. God bless the creature, so pathetic is it, that even the explosion was small and unremarkable. Like a sneeze, only its skull shattered and blood poured out its precious acorn-sized snout.

Age: 31-35

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Customer Review:
By Wiper from Minot, ND

Cons: Does not provide any stimulation to the genitals, so don't bother. Another product that ignores the needs of the sex-positive community. HELLO, WE SHOP FROM HIGH-ALTITUDE CATALOGS, TOO.

Pros: Dogs no longer viciously bite my genitals??? Guess that's an "improvement."

Age: 31-35

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Customer Review:
By LonelySkies from Gallup, NM

Pros: emits a high pitched sound that only the dogs can hear.

Cons: the dog loves the sound and bark constantly to trigger it.

For reference my dog is a rescue dog that I got after my third husband was killed in a small airplane crash (he crashed his car into a small airplane while driving down the runway). I thought for sure Stuart was the one, especially after it took me ten years to learn to love again following the death of Ron, who died in a mine collapse. They said it was a suicide. I have lived alone for the past 4 years and I am terminally ill suffering from chronic pain that causes me to swear uncontrollably all day, and also black out. I'm sleeping on a breathing machine but not right now because I'm writing this. I love the show Everybody Loves Raymond and hate the Big Band Theory because I'm not interested in jokes about a computer. I am thankful every day for the gift of life and have had a great one. God bless.

Age: 56-60

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Customer Review:
By QuietDown from Loveland, CO

Did not work on my awful yapping dogs, so I put them and the collar in a box and shipped 'em to my ex-wife. May she forever be hounded-- no puns intended here-- by these useless creatures.

I miss you so much, Sylvia. Please take me back. I'm not the same man I am before and the hair problem is under control.

Age: 36-40

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Customer Review:
By Canada4Life from Brownsville, TX

My dog can't hear it, but I can. I scream every time and it gets him excited to bark even more. I'm rolling on the floor in my own filth and he won't stop barking.

I can't tell you how happy I am to finally find the right product.

Age: 36-40

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Customer Review:
By FullTimeWiccan from Grand Island, NE

Doesn't work on my husband, even though he's a dog.

Age: 41-45

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Customer Review:
By HoarbFamily from Brainerd, MN

Works great on my child, who hasn't barked at all for as long as she's worn the apparatus. When she turns three, we will remove it for a trial period.

Age: 31-35

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Customer Review:
By Darrell Crispus from Juneau, AK

I have been annoyed my dogs my whole life. Now I wear one of these like a wristwatch and walk around with total impunity. No dog can bark at me without immediately being startled. I've never felt so alive... or powerful.

Age: 46-50

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Customer Review:
By Shirley from Springfield, MO

help

years ago i installed the excite toolbar and it broke my netscape navigator. now i can't search and i can only keep moving forward, always forward, one link at a time, hoping to find my way back to my home page. i landed on this page because it was the only way forward. i do know what this collar is but since i don't have one and it's not fixing my internet problems i am giving it a big fat zero. also i don't like dogs because many of them are pitbulls that are trained to attack children. if anybody knows how to remove the broken excite toolbar from my netscape navigator please email me at shirleyshandmadediapers@hotmail.com so i can read your message but it may be many years yet before i make it back to that site so please be patient.

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Customer Review:
By CROATOAN from Redding, CA

NOT GOOD ENOUGH. He is still thinking about the barks, even if he isn't saying them out loud. I need a device that can silence his thoughts, and this is not it. He is getting away with it, and it is driving me insane. I need a stronger model.

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)