Trillaphon: I can’t decide which is funnier - the producers of this movie tricking that fat kid into thinking he has some kind of actual future in acting by casting him as a walking fart noise, or the director thinking it’d be a great idea to have the other kid pretend to take a picture with a phone that’s clearly off while the camera stares straight at it.
Hydrogen: That’s a head-scratcher, but both options are way funnier than any of the intentional attempts at comedy to be found here.
Trillaphon: You know you’re in deep trouble when the best actor in your "comedy" movie by far is Chris Farley’s lesser known brother Kevin, whose other classic roles include “that one guy from The Waterboy so forgettable he doesn’t even show up in 1,000 word plot summaries of the film” and “Drunk Santa” in the critically-panned Friends spinoff Joey.
Hydrogen: Being the least hateable person in this movie isn’t exactly clearing a high bar, but to give you an idea of just how shitty and half-assed this movie is, Kevin Farley is so above their level that they could only even get him for a total of about 10 minutes of screentime. He’s like the Ice-T of this movie.
Trillaphon: I bet no Farley ever thought they would end up being the Ice-T of anything.
It needs to consume human tissue! It needs to speak to your manager!
Scourgelord Vilius Mandragore gave a speech from our shattered capital on Friday and we are here to fact check his claims about his million year empire.
Reason 9: Ongoing mechanical issues with the internal Superman 64 fog machine.
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