The last example of flame mail from the "Amnesiac" review comes courtesy of "Jim Wright," who ends his raving tirade with the sentence "Feel free to email me back with personal apologies, at jrw187@hotmail.com." Yeah, I'll be getting right on that one there, hero!

From: Jim Wright
Subject: Review of Radiohead's "Amnesiac"

Whoever wrote this review is, quite simply, an imbecile. I clicked on a link to read a review of Amnesiac, hoping to find something even slightly insightful. That's all I was looking for, maybe just some thoughts on......... well, anything. But there was no thinking involved when this review was written. In all truthfullness, the fact that this review appears on a sight called TruthMedia is either pathetically sad or absolutely hilarious.

Without even getting into the obvious jealously of Radiohead by a "fellow musician," as the person calls him or her self, or the general lack of understanding anything about their music, which are both immediately apparent when reading this review, I'd just like to point out the myriad of stupid mistakes made in writing it.

First of all, the review starts right off by spelling Thom Yorke's name wrong (as "Tom York"). Ok, maybe this was an attempt at saying, "I'm American, I'm not going to spell his name with an 'h' and an 'e'." Well, if this is true, guess what? He's not American, and he spells his name with an 'h' and an 'e'!! Look, if you're going to criticize somebody, don't be such a jackass and try to spell their name right. Otherwise, you immediately lose all credibility to criticize them!

Next up, a bunch of song titles were wrong. This is sadly ridiculous. If you didn't even look at the album to read the song titles for more than half a second, it makes the reader wonder, "did this person even listen to the album for more than half a second??" Radiohead makes music that doesn't reveal all it's secrets the first time around. It's called being artistic, you should look into it. Personally, I think the greatest films and albums are ones that get better each time I see them or listen to them. Apparently, whoever reviewed this album likes everything to be shown to them the first time around, so they can move on and do more piss-poor reviews of other albums for their mockery of a website. "Truthmedia"?............ the media thrives on not telling the whole truth, so I figured that's what a website called Truthmedia would do -- tell the whole truth. But there's no truth in this review. Just idiocy. I think you can shorten your name to just "Media," because that's all I'm seeing. More bullshit. Just to clarify about the song titles:

"Life Spinning Plates" is really titled "Like Spinning Plates"
"Push/Pull Revolving Doors" is really "Pull/Pulk Revolving Doors"
"You and Whose Army" has a question mark(?) at the end ot the title
"Like a Glass House" is really "Life in a Glass House"
"Knifes Out" is really "Knives Out"
"Dollars and Sense" is really "Dollars & Cents"

Most of the above titles have a lot to do with the content of the songs -- and the entire meaning of that content is lost when you begin by mispelling and misinterpreting the titles.

To add to these pathetic misspellings, the lyrical excerpts that were included in the review, in order to be made fun of, were incorrect. The most frustrating part is that the incorrect parts of the lyrics were the ones that were made fun of. For example, the review says that the lyrics for "Like Spinning Plates" are,

While you make pretty speeches,
I'm being put to bed.
You feed me to the lions,
a definite balance

The real lyrics are as follows,

While you make pretty speeches,
I'm being cut to shreds.
You feed me to the lions,
A delicate balance.

Now, when considering the real lyrics, the stupid-ass comments made by the reviewer about Thom's alleged drug addiction just don't make sense.

To back up a bit, though, the reviewer says that two of the highlights are "Hunting Bears" and "Life in a Glass House," which he or she says "feature clever tongue-twisters and the pulse-pounding drum work of John Greenwood..." This is so moronic!!!!! "Hunting Bears" is a guitar-only instrumental, so it has neither of the features mentioned, and "Life in a Glass House" is a slow, jazzy tune that hardly has pulse-pounding drum work (which the reviewer claims to have been done by the guitarist/programmer!?!).

Right after this, the reviewer says that most of the songs fail to make sense once you really listen to the lyrics, something he or she completely failed to do!!

The lyrics given in the review for "Knives Out" are,

So knives out
Catch the mouse
Don't look down
Shove it in your mouse
If you'd been a dog
They would have drowned you at Perth

The real lyrics are as follows

So knives out
Catch the mouse
Don't look down
Shove it in your mouth
If you'd been a dog
They would have drowned you at birth

Now, these two simple corrections to the lyrics once again make the reviewers remarks seem a lot more nonsensical than he or she thinks Radiohead's lyrics are. What do you do at "TruthMedia," change people's lyrics so you can make fun of them. This is the most contrived criticism I've ever seen in my life. What.......... did you have to make stuff up so that you could be critical of it. Why don't you just try intelligently interpreting the album. Is it because you lack even the smallest amount of intellect??

I'm not even going to waste any more of my time commenting on the "Winnie the Pooh" and "Limp Bizkit" remarks, since their mentioning alone shows the reviewer's level of mental capacity.

Please do yourselves a favor and shut down your lame excuse for a website......... or at least change your name to "Even_more_contrived_and_unintelligent_bullshit_than_the_real_Media.com"

Although, I guess your main site's name says it all -- "Something Awful."

Feel free to email me back with personal apologies, at jrw187@hotmail.com

Well, that's all the emails I care to cut and paste at the moment, but you can be sure that there are currently over135of these entertaining rants from people who have absolutely no clue whatsoever. Let us all take a moment and weep for society as a whole.

- TruthMedia Editor

– TruthMedia Editor

More Truth Media [Flames]

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.

  • DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

About This Column

Truth Media seeks to lure out the brainless zealots mindlessly spewing words about faceless companies and products they have no relation to. Why do folks get so worked up over such inconsequential things? Truth Media is here, not to discover the answer to this, but just to make fun of them.

Suggested Articles

Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful