Dungeons & Dragons Module B1: "In Search of the Unknown" - Part 1

Zack: You and your companions set off across the countryside towards the last known location of Questlandia. It is a nice day.

Steve: I am wary of danger.

Zack: You encounter a bird chirping suspiciously. It looks to be a Blue Jay.

Steve: I command my henchmen to assail it with their magic as I creep closer in order to use my spear.

Zack: The bird begins calling you fat.

Steve: "Cease your unholy words, bird! I am not fat at all!"

Zack: Trebbelos the baby magician uses his ESP powers to determine the outcome of the battle. "You will lose this one, fatso!"

Steve: I hurl my spear through the bird's accursed breast.

Zack: The spear strikes the tree and sticks into its trunk. The bird flies to a different tree. You can hear it asking if you missed because your fat got in your eyes.

Steve: You win this one, bird, but mark my words, I will be back with more spears and greater ability to throw them.

Zack: The bird is unconvinced.

Steve: We continue on to Questlandia.

Zack: Soon you arrive outside a mountain fortress. As you enter, you see several dead adventurers, their bodies rotting, who have triggered traps and been killed.

Steve: This Joe Rogan is a trapper. What are his methods?

Zack: It appears he has planted dart traps that are laced with DMT, sending each adventurer on their internal death journey to a spiritual realm while their body is left to die. Also spike traps.

Steve: We continue on, but more cautious of mind-altering experiences.

Zack: You want to have your mind altered? Let's talk about the so-called moon landing.