You enter the gas station and walk straight to the soda case. An obnoxious country song comes out of the speakers, and you notice that there is no one inside. You pull out a large Mountain Dew and head to the cashier. Groping your pockets, you realize that you don't have any money. He smirks, but tells you that he can't give goods out for free.
"Listen," you say, getting his attention, then tell him how important it is that you get this soda.
"Well, I guess there is one way you can get your soda" He says, smiling.
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
Previous Articles
- Mutant League Draft Prospects
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- Subj: LETS MAKE TURBO TARTS FAMOUS
