My Flag Stands for Heritage, Not Hate

Why, I can sit on my porch on a sweltering July day and I can almost picture the Battle of Nashville. A battle where the Confederates didn't even know how to properly dig a hole and were subsequently massacred by the Union attacks because they dug their trenches all wrong. The brave Union attacks utterly destroyed the southerners.

I can almost picture the smiles on the faces of black union soldiers as they finally got to shoot and stab and hack at all the white Confederate soldiers. Of course, mostly shooting and stabbing them in the back as they tried to run from their poorly-dug trenches.

Although, one thing that needs to be very clear is that the Civil War was not about slavery at all. Whatever Erasmus said was just his personal opinion. The Civil War was actually about the federal government's right to tell a state that they cannot fucking have slaves anymore and that new states can't have fucking slaves and to stop having all these slaves and fucking them. The south tried to deny the rights of the federal government to make such a decision and so they betrayed their country and forced hundreds of thousands to die in a pathetic war they lost in total defeat.

That's all the flag means to me. Total victory over the south and the assertion of the federal government's freedom to tell states not to have slaves.

You will notice on the flag that all of the southern states are represented at the bottom of the flag while all of the northern states are the stars at the top. Even later states added after the Civil War were allowed to be placed at the top of the flag. This is because states like Alaska and Hawaii and others never betrayed their country or enslaved anyone, so they deserve to be up at the top and not down in the star sewer where the devils live.

Does it make me a bigot to fly this flag? Of course not. The only bigots are reverse bigots. The sort of people who can't comprehend that a flag like this means the historical triumph of northern military might over the south. Did you know that even during the civil war the Union flag still featured the stars of the southern states? It's true, but they were yellow instead of white because southerners were cowards who fled the battlefield at every opportunity and were doomed from the start by their corrupt way of living.

So the next time you see someone proudly flying the flag of the United States of America, give them a salute and say a little thanks to Abraham Lincoln. There's a reason there is a huge bad ass statue of him in Washington D.C. and not some traitor idiot like Jefferson Davis.

Don't be afraid to fly the flag of the USA. It's okay to be proud of your heritage.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)