Something Awful is Getting Sued, And It's All Thanks to Hitler

The battle over Hitler continued.

FROM: Shauntece Laurant

Mr. Kyanka,

I am not sure if I should continue to be entertained by your petty comments or to advise you that the claim has already been forwarded to our litigation team. If it makes you feel bigger, better or more handsome to continue your insults then by all means.

Your tactics won't hurt my feelings nor will they distract us from the bigger picture. But hey, you may do what ever makes you feel better.

Best

I think "Bigger, Better, More Handsome" was the name of that one song by the guys who wear those robot heads and play questionable electronic music.

FROM: Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka

Shauntece,

If I am not mistaken, and I never am, you appear to have both been entertained AND informative regarding the claim forwarding. Now that's what I call the best of both worlds! You had your cake and ate it too! Again, I could opt for the obvious joke here that explicitly insinuates you eat urinal cakes, but as I am already both very big and handsome, I will not bother. But I am curious: do you eat urinal cakes? You may take as much time as you like to answer.

I am glad my nefarious tactics are unable to distract you from the "bigger picture," which I am assuming is the one of Hitler, the guy your law firm is threatening to sue me over. Please, do not distract your fellow employees who are diligently researching how many billions of dollars you can sue me for because a member of my forums posted a link to an image hosted on Imgur. Of course a much easier solution here would be to have one of your fellow Higbee human toilet people contact Imgur and request they remove the image. Or contact the person who uploaded the image. But clearly I'm not a high powered lawyer like you fine folks at the Hitler Image Protection Legal Firm.

Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka
CEO and now also PRESIDENT of internet

PS: I am starting to suspect that you might not actually be wishing me "best," as the end of your email claims. Please let me know if I'm off-base here, and it's just a simple misunderstanding. I wish your litigation team the best of luck with their precious Hitler image!

I must admit, I did feel better after sending that reply. In fact, I felt so good that I threw in a followup email at absolutely no charge! I'm pretty much the best person on the internet!

Oh, and since I'm such a swell guy, I'll send you a little graphic explaining Imgur's copyright and linking policies, which clearly dictates the copyright responsibility for each and every image is the sole responsibility of the individual who uploaded it. I'm sure it was just a freak accident that you guys somehow missed the literal first search result for "copyright law and internet image links Imgur," but it's not like you guys are lawyers whose sole job is to do such things as required by the law. Here's the link as well; let me know if you require explicit, step by step instructions detailing how to click internet links.

https://help.imgur.com/hc/en-us/art...ws-article-etc-

Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka
Owner and founder of Imgur, Your One Stop Source For All Images Hitler.

I included the following image, just in case the employees of Higbee and Associates lacked sufficient manual dexterity to both click on a link and then read the words that appear.

Wow, will you look at that. Right there, on Imgur's website. Words that say images hosted on their site are the legal responsibility of the "image owner," which is defined as "the original uploader." Weird how if you read the words that say things, you can like understand stuff and shit. What a world!

So as of this moment, I'm currently waiting in a holding pattern, as the Hitler loving piss chuggers at Higbee and Associates prepare their next crafty legal maneuver. I will keep you all updated of any developments in the ongoing legal fight against jpg Imgur Hitler. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@TwitterHasBannedAllMyAccountsEver)