Sometimes people will tell children "stop crying, or I'll give you something to cry about!" This seems like a strange, self-perpetuating way to treat the crying problem, but whatever. So, you have this wailing toddler, and you tell it "stop crying, or I'll give you something to cry about," and then you show it this update, which features bad-ass tots doing bad-ass shit. And the kid cries even harder, and this is totally because it feels shamed by its peers' exploits and not at all because you are failing to address some other physical reason for its original outburst!
I saw good men turned to mush in the wars against the soggies. Men much better than you, Mr. President. If you are going to take John Brennan's security clearance, take my security clearance too.
Forget beer checkers, beer chess and beer dejarik. Only these games are guaranteed to put you on dialysis by age 30.
Bonk: The Only Good Bonk Is A Head Bonk
We review every game from the last 2 months, plus all 21 SNES Classic titles
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