This was already broken by the Second Life Insider, but some forum goons let me in on the backstory.
Seems some upstanding young members of the goon group w-hat were approached by a furry named Dj Wolcott in Second Life. Wolcott, an admin of the furry group Furpleasure--which had crashed the Baku grid earlier that week--wanted to contract w-hat to do a "hit" on another furry group. Hey, I guess if they can have a Furry United Nations they can have Furry Wars.
In any case, these young gentlegoons wanted to let it be known that w-hat never griefs for profit like mere mercenaries. And because I know how everyone loves chatlogs (on the Internet!) here are some selections from the sting, which was conducted against a member of an ancient order!
A Dark And Shadowy PlaceDeathmike Germparrot: DJ at furpleasure everybody
Deathmike Germparrot: now if i get this right DJ is in interested in contracting W Hat to grief places
Dj Walcott: thats right
Deathmike Germparrot: mr funkerton will take over negotations
Dj Walcott: Ok
Funkerton Freelunch: Correct.
Dj Walcott: so whats the deal?
Sara Hebert: What is it you're looking for?
Dj Walcott: prices
Sara Hebert: For... what?
Dj Walcott: all i am looking for at the current time re prices
Forrar Fanwood: what places do you want to have griefed specifically. prices would vary based on that
Dj Walcott: No deal
Sara Hebert: It's kind of hard to really set a price for something with so few details.
Dj Walcott: you tell me basic prices first then we negotiate when and where after the money is delivered
Sara Hebert: Let's just start over from the beginning.
Sara Hebert: What would we need to do?
Dj Walcott: some Greefing
Dj Walcott: if you are TRULY members of W-hat
Dj Walcott: then you know the deal the hams have with Furpleasure
Funkerton Freelunch: True members?
Sara Hebert: Don't mention the W-Hat inner circle, Funk!
Sara Hebert: OHSH
Dj Walcott: How much for the tools to do this
Forrar Fanwood: yeah. just to get this solid though, you are offering 2000 linden dollars in exchange for griefy particle rezzers, and possibly recursive physics scripts
Dj Walcott: define recrsice physics scripts
Forrar Fanwood: scripts which would create physical objects in a recursive of nested fashion
Dj Walcott: what is the likelyhood of one of those crashing a sim?
Forrar Fanwood: 100%
Forrar Fanwood: I recall several instances where objecs like that released on the mainland caused entire grid outages
Forrar Fanwood: The question is are you interrested in this or not
Dj Walcott: i am
Deathmike Germparrot: and is you doing this as a indvidual or on behalf of FP
Sara Hebert: We need to know who to contact, and if you're offline and we can talk to others, that would help a lot.
Forrar Fanwood: working for an organization is different from working for an individual
Dj Walcott: me
Forrar Fanwood: as that the morals behind it, however lacking, change
Dj Walcott: thats all you need to know[
Forrar Fanwood: have you ever seen munich?
Dj Walcott: was a shit movie
Forrar Fanwood: munich was a utilitarian essay on ethics, and I would appreciate if you would stop talking poorly about it. reguardless there are some things we need to know up front
Dj Walcott: Hollywood is nothing more then Leftwing democratic scum
Dj Walcott: now i am also willing to come to work for you in order to buy protection for Furpleasure
Deathmike Germparrot: expand on this point further dear DJ
Sara Hebert: What did they do to warrant this attempt at griefing, anyways? Just for some background.
Dj Walcott: money
Dj Walcott: they took form me a total sum of 15000L
Sara Hebert: Feted Inner Core. Elitist jerks.
Dj Walcott: If the lindens only knew who REALLY made the world go around
Deathmike Germparrot: and who does make SL go round?
Forrar Fanwood: AT&T/MA BELL make the world go round now days
Dj Walcott: no the REAL wold my little froddy fellow
Sara Hebert: The media?
Deathmike Germparrot: the jews?
Dj Walcott: Older than the media
Deathmike Germparrot: masons?
Dj Walcott: Bingdo This is the face of terrorDeathmike Germparrot: so your a freemason
Dj Walcott: Ahh yes i am
Dj Walcott: as well as a Knight Templar
Sara Hebert: So were these folks who angered you freemasons, or something?
Dj Walcott: Could be Sara
Sara Hebert: I don't really want to mess with any masons, online or off..
Dj Walcott: then you know it isnt wise to cross us
Forrar Fanwood: anyway, enough of this conspiracy skulduggery and stuff. just tell us when, where, and what
Sara Hebert: Actually, I think we need to know something else first.
Dj Walcott: that is
Sara Hebert: How can we be sure you're not going to hit something we don't want you to hit?
Deathmike Germparrot: like Baku
Dj Walcott: You tll me what you dont want hit
Dj Walcott: Baku is safe
Deathmike Germparrot: also leave Prokofy Neva alone. we have a "deal" with the SLS over her
Sara Hebert: If this is over 15,000, this is worth a lot more to you than 2000, no?
Deathmike Germparrot: 1000 up front
Deathmike Germparrot: 1200 later
Dj Walcott: No deal
Dj Walcott: see ya
Funkerton Freelunch: Wait
Funkerton Freelunch: One last thing
Funkerton Freelunch: DJ
Funkerton Freelunch: Please listen to my last point.
Dj Walcott: being
Forrar Fanwood: SMILE YOUR ON CANDID CHATLOG! I LOVE SURPRISES!Sara Hebert: We've been working on this case for YEARS.
Sara Hebert: FINALLY
Deathmike Germparrot: OH NOES THE MASONS WILL PROTECT HIM
Sara Hebert: They might build a house at us.
Dj Walcott: just talk
Sara Hebert: Thomas Jefferson is dead, sir.
Sara Hebert: Who can save you now?
Funkerton Freelunch: We did this for Uncle Sam.
Furry wars? Electronic whores? These are not things I see shown in press releases or news articles about Second Life! I demand equal representation! We shall make our own virtual utopia, with our own propaganda! WE SHALL FEAR FURSECUTION NEVERMORE!
–
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Second Life Safari highlights a magical and mystical adventure through the bowels of the Internet. We take a look behind the scenes of "Second Life," and present to you the things all other media outlets are too embarrassed to show. Social networking hits another new low, and can only be seen in Second Life Safari.
Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful