FreedomWriter, submitted by karosine21. After toiling away with Batman's unique brand of problem solving, I think we need to settle down and relax with something a lot more reasonable. Unfortunately this site is not reasonable. Aliens are coming, and I don't know if Intergalactic Batman will be able to stop them!
What is referred to as the Companion Star to the Hale-Bopp Comet is , in fact, a massive extra-terrestrial space craft (apparently from the Orion Constellation of the Pliades) some twelve thousand miles in diameter...about four times the size of Earth.
The craft has been sending decipherable messages as it approaches. The impending visitation apparently represents the return of some visitors that had contact with the Eisenhower Administration back in 1953. At that time they admonished our leaders to quit mistreating and corrupting the people of earth, causing them to develop a nature of hostile aggression toward other beings; adding that failure to do so would necessitate their return.
The entities themselves appeared to be energy in form, humanoid in shape, and wore uniforms with a red triangle on the shoulder patch. Their vehicle bore the letters YAH on the side (an apparent abbreviation for the name Yahweh). Orion in the Pliades has particular import, Biblically.
It certainly seems like Intergalactic Batman should aid them, since they seek only to help us overcome our enemies. And boy are they some dastardly people.
The Nazis were financed by Vatican Bank and Hitler has yet to be excommunicated by the Pope. The Vatican now owns the private bank called Federal Reserve that also participates in financing their global mischief and empire building, using your and my credit. We and our children are regarded as legal collateral for the national debt [check the deliberately confusing legalese on birth certificates and on the back of most states' marriage licenses]. Thus the kidnapping of over one million American children each year by the F.B.I. is "legal" to lawyers, judges and the British nobility title lawyer-politicians preappointed to office, though masked through rigged U.S. political elections.
The C.I.A. was formed from 50 fully-intact Nazi S.S. cells brought to America BEFORE the end of the war under Nazi S.S. chief Rienhard Gehland and put in charge of all U.S. spy activities...under the condition that they would never operate within the boundaries of the United States. Bush Sr.'s self-named Murder Inc. (CIA) has the motto: "Give us the coroner and we will control the town". The C.I.A. has now made itself part of Nazi Homeland Security, along side the Russian General made Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff at our Pentagon. There exists a Sino-Soviet pact to conquer the world, along side most other members of the "consortium of nations". My testimony is not to be allowed.
The Twin Towers debacle was engineered by the Vatican's U.S. C.I.A on behalf of the Pope, to justify the PERMANENT suspension of our Constitution and the immediate federal seizure of all food, water, transportation and communication sources as per Presidential Executive Order #11490. Even Congress has been permanently suspended, though is required to meet in order to mantain the illusion of there remaining some justice or due process in America. "You can have a free press without having a free country, but not the other way around" to quote my pastor Dr. Gene Scott of the Los Angeles University Cathedral - a Stanford University PhD.
This sounds less like the work of the Pope, a senile man who dresses more gaudy than Elton John, and more like the work of President Lex Luther. There is definitely trouble coming.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Play your entire PS1 library from a single SD card. But not your Brady Strategy Guides.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.