Zack: He constantly drops his tampons from his purple purse into his boots.
Steve: He engineered his own titanium whips that shoot electricity and can turn into nunchucks, SO WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING?!?!!?
Zack: When the mafia really needs somebody whipped they call whip expert Mark Scarlotti. *Pushes picture across table* "He designs his own whips."
Steve: "Don Cabrisi wants the bank job done clean. No more innocent people dying. That means no guns."
Zack: "The plan is we go in with whips, crack them, flip our capes around, then fill our purses with as much money as we can. Which isn't gonna be a lot because we need to carry batteries for our whips."
Steve: Cut to the next day when Action 5 News is doing their story about "The Gay Bank Heist."
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- Marvel Super Heroes' Monster Manual: Volume One (Part 1)
- The Fantastic Artwork of Frank Frazetta
- The 10 Reasons We Will Never Review F.A.T.A.L.
- More Lost Treasures of the AD&D 2nd Edition Monstrous Compendium
- Lost Treasures of the AD&D 2nd Edition Monstrous Compendium
