Steve: This looks like a pretty intense fight!
Zack: Come on, Steve! BE DESCRIPTIVE!
Steve: Okay, Cammy is doing a spinny thing on her hand and kicking out and backwards with her legs. I don't know how her hat is staying on, maybe like centrifugal force or something. And she seems like she's dodging the swipe of this dude who looks like an old man sailor with one big eye and he's got a lobster claw sort of stuck down in his wrist.
Zack: Yeah, but what does it smell like?
Steve: Like a sweaty clam.
Zack: I've been there before. Two drink minimum, all nude. I've got the lobster scars to prove it.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.