If It Weren't For These Amateurish Mistakes, Alien Would Be A Classic Movie

1. The titular alien looks almost nothing like E.T.

2. No attempt is made to hide the fact that Ripley is the actress Sigourney Weaver. No bandit mask, no hiding her face behind strategically placed palm fronds, etc.

3. Human blood is supposed to be red, not white.

4. Everyone's voice is normally pitched. The movie practically clobbers us over the head with reminders that the submarine is packed with helium, yet no one talks with a high voice? Yeah, right.

5. One of the aliens is clearly just a cat. Couldn't be bothered to paste a pair of antennae to its head, could you Mr. Giger?

6. When things start to go wrong and laws get severely broken nobody calls the police.

7. In the scene where they discover the egg buckets, there are no landmarks or street signs identifying the location as New York city. It's like they weren't even trying.

8. When that guy lays down on the dinner table and his chest bursts open, no one sets the food aside or covers it with a lid. Are we to believe they ate that food later or threw it away?

9. Some parts of the movie accidentally use imagery and situations that evoke sex. This distracts viewers from the story the film's makers are attempting to tell.

– Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell (@DennisFarrell)