Media, content, and all that other stuff. One thing's for sure - we love to consume it all. But in today's world of digital downloads, cloud storage and peer-to-peer file transfers, is there still a place for physical media? The brick-and-mortar shops do their best to compete with the online marketplace - games are often cheaper to buy in-store, and albums can be put out physically months, sometimes even years before a digital release. Still, both legal and illegal methods of obtaining the good shit online threaten to overtake the struggling physical-media industry, like when print died.

However, they're not going down without a fight. Since the "stick" (bad thing) approach didn't really work out, many production and distribution conglomerates are extending a "carrot" (good thing) by offering extra incentives to purchase a physical copy. It's unclear at the moment if they'll persevere and triumph, or if they'll go the way of the cinema, which I read was dying, on gawker or some other bullshit site. Either way, the consumer is definitely a winner here, with a wide variety of enhanced content available!

Music

Fact: Music piracy has been called "definitely not the most popular form of piracy, but definitely [...] the best," by Ian Cohen in a 2005 editorial for Pitchfork Magazine. He went on to say that it was "reminiscent of the feeling when you first drove a car down the city streets at night, lights blurring through the raindrops on the windshield, junior high memories, Radiohead, and [Music Piracy] will definitely always hold a special place in my heart. 9.8."

  • My Bloody Valentine - Loveless (2012 Vinyl reissue): Exclusive information from the band on their then-upcoming project, which would later metamorphose into - as we now know - Kevin Shield's ill-fated solo ska EP.
  • Death Grips - The Money Store: You can take off the sticker that says The Money Store and see some tits right there on the cover. Don't get that with an mp3.
  • Childish Gambino - Because the Internet: Disc gives 100 free hours of AOL
  • Deadmau5 - Various: Cut-out-and-keep membership card for "Joel's super friend fun club," containing membership number, holographic Deadmau5 authenticity seal, and link to official club website. As of June 2014, URL redirects to suspended tumblr account "fuckyeahasiancarcrashes"
  • Swans - To be Kind: Rare copy of Michael Gira's unpublished 1994 Teen Beat interview
  • Daft Punk - Random Access Memories: A pair of freaking NOSTALGIA GOGGLES, which you can use to enjoy this piece of crap album! Just kidding - it doesn't really come with that. It's actually packaged with a small vial of Hitler's cum.
  • "Weird Al" Yankovic - Mandatory Fun: Untitled, hand-written collection of some of Al's alt-lit prose poetry (Limited to first 50 copies of cassette run)
  • Metronomy - Love Letters: Comes with a fun album filled with great tunes, equally suited for getting the party started or just chilling out to alone.
  • My friend Tembus's Album: scent of damp hemp, creased photocopy of 2013 show flyer

Games

Fact: In 2012, 1,000,000 digital downloads of games were made via the Playstation Network alone. In 2013, that figure had risen to, let's say... 2,000,000.

  • XCOM Declassified: Censor bars on case lift to reveal the word "Fuck" over and over
  • Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes: Packaged with a fun little rubber ball to bounce and play with. Have hours of silly and frantic fun with your little rubber ball.
  • Mario Kart 8: You can use your imagination to pretend that the game is a racing kart, or even a ramp. The sky's the limit.
  • Metal Gear Rising: Revengance (US, EU, AU): Ouch! Careful not to cut yourself on the sharp paper of the game's manual! It's a fun and interactive challenge of the game's experience. Are you a gamer - or have you become a cybernetic ninja with a grudge?
  • Metal Gear Rising: Revengance (JP): 2" long replica of Raiden's HF-bladed katana
  • Heavy Rain: A little origami figure for you to make, like in the game. This one isn't a joke - just appreciation of a nice touch.
  • Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3: Blank "notes" section at the end of the game's manual allows players to write down their own tips, tricks, and ruminations on the game's lore.
  • DMC: Devil May Cry: game case is full of thumbtacks and pencil shavings and shit
  • Sonic: Lost World: Bonus disc featuring a 40-minute-long youtube video of a 34-year-old man having asthma attacks in time to spin dashes

Movies

Fact: The Movie is the first mass-media "art form" to refer to its proponents as consumers, just these sexless, gaping mouths to be crammed with entertainment until sated. The standard "Movie Consumer" weighs 300 pounds, is completely shaven, and is driven around while rolling to and fro in a pickup truck's bed. Movie Consumers refer to the medium of Cinema as "Theatre 2, the sequel to theatre."

  • The Raid 2: Haven't seen this one yet
  • The Lego Movie: Pointy bit you always step on
  • Godzilla (2014): Refund, Apology note
  • Heaven is for Real: Have your own "little piece of heaven" with a free sample of creamy, silky smooth Galaxy chocolate
  • 12 Years a Slave: Figurine, plastic tree model, pre-tied piece of string. Instructions withheld due to pending litigation
  • The Grand Budapest Hotel: DVD case stylized as tiny steamer trunk [absent from Blu-ray release]
  • 300: Rise of an Empire: Haha, yeah, I totally bought this DVD. "300: Rise of an Empire? I love that movie, it's so good. Oh nice, a chance to spend actual money so that I can watch the movie whenever I want. I think I'll buy two DVD's, in case I lose one" -Motherfucking me
  • The Wolf of Wall Street: Director's commentary, cast commentary, camripper's commentary
  • Oldboy: A kinder surprise egg
  • Oldboy (US): A kinder surprise egg with no toy
  • Gravity: Piece of paper with this article printed on it
  • Captain America: The Winter Soldier: The marketing team was kind of all over the place with this one, so you can make your own Captain America paper doll, dress it up however you want, and share photos of it at www.whatsyourcaptainamerica.com. Sorry.

– David "g0m" Dolan (@g0m)

More Front Page News

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.

  • DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful