A Visit to the Super Smash Bros. Gym

When the Wii was first designed, it was thought of as the "play together in the same room with friends and family system." Recently, a co-worker told me about the Internet so I decided it would be fruitful to let you play games of Smash Bros. "on the line," as they say. I tried my best, so I hope you will accept it in knowing this.

To begin, we have varying modes of online play.

It is as easy as learning the many tax codes of your home prefecture!

With Smash Bros., all of your friends are only one simple 16-digit code away from you! If you enjoy using the phone, then I assume you will enjoy entering in the codes for the friends you will play online. These codes offer seven more numbers than the standard phone sum, and as we all know sixteen is "greater than" nine!

Your friend code is hidden in your Wii, so it should be a fun kind of scavenging game to find it. Please search with my support.

Luigi is full of honesty. His face reflects the horror of my words.

Some have expressed a desire to play against random strangers on the Internet, so I went to the task with your safety in mind. Thusly, you will never be able to share information of any kind, nor will you hold any kind of online ranking which documents the hours you spend with the game. Your foes and you will pass like ships in the night, never truly knowing each others' faces.

Since I intended for Smash Bros. to be a relaxing game, this fits well with my current theme. Do not let the Internet race of rats get to you. Think of your opponents as mannequins who can not defame you or your family with their texts. I think this will make us all more relaxed.

The values of Wario are deemed inappropriate by society. This is why he is a comical one!

Still, even with such hot modes of play available, there are some who would complain. I guess it is true when they say "It is the pickled eel that is tastiest which is not blessed by the spirit of the winds!" To relieve these complaints, we are devising a way to charge funds for expanded online play, for what better way to track your fighting talents than through a statement of banking?

This will also give you the chance to input more numbers on your Wii console, so please anticipate this.

– Bob "BobServo" Mackey