Internet critic James Rolfe recently caused some controversy by declaring his refusal to review this summer's upcoming Ghostbusters movie--a completely mature and level-headed response to a mass-market comedy if I've ever heard one. Over the past week, Rolfe's stance provoked endless discussion, something my own content has failed to generate despite the fact that I've refused to review hundreds, if not thousands of movies in my lifetime. That's right: Ghostbusters is no different. Even though as a dork on the Internet I'm apparently obligated to review Ghostbusters 2016, I refuse. And the following bullet points should fully outline my watertight defense.
Following America's defeat in World War 3, allied forces uncovered a number of experimental weapon prototypes in the hotel-compound of Trump's loyalist Space Force army. Had the war continued just a few more months, these secret weapons would have changed the course of the war.
Extremely proud over here! The bosses took notice and I have been promoted to 20 cages!!
Are there arrows in Tomb Raider? "No. Absolutely not."
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