The Coalition Ethos and Aesthetic

Zack: Now that's just obnoxious. We get it! You love death!

Steve: Skulls are the primary building block of the Coalition. Pretty much their whole empire is skull-based. You name a mode of transportation and it has skulls.

Zack: Well I guess I don't have to name flying loaf of skull bread on a UFO.

Steve: Flying skull motorcycles. Skull tanks. They even have a walker that's just a skull with big cannons on it.

Zack: These guys are starting to piss me off.

Steve: They should, they're sorta the bad guys of Rifts.

Zack: Hmmmmmmmmmmmm. Love Hitler. Skulls on everything. Never would have guessed.

Steve: Well, they're human though, so they aren't as evil as like the Splugorth.

Zack: I'm not even going to ask.

Steve: Yeah, that's a whole other issue, but they're the guys on the cover.

Zack: Okay, so what does the Coalition believe in?

Steve: They hate magic. And extra dimensional creatures. Pretty much anything that came through a Rift. And drugs.

Zack: Are they also wasting billions a year in a war against people smoking a harmless plant?

Steve: No, they hate Juicers. They are like extreme sports guys in football padding who inject drugs and then fight like berzerkers.

Zack: I bet he is tough as hell as long as he doesn't have to bend or change positions.

Steve: The Coalition also hate magic cities and usually is bombing them or skirmishing.

Zack: Magic cities?

Steve: Like Tolkeen.

Zack: Oh fuck off.

Steve: No, that's what it's called!

Zack: I don't believe you.

Steve: Fine, don't, but they released like ten books about a war between the Coalition and Tolkeen.

Okay, okay. So they hate steroids and Gandalf. What do they like?

Steve: Skulls.

Zack: Besides Skulls.

Steve: Dogs.


Steve: Dogs.

Zack: Dogs??

More WTF, D&D!?

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.



    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2023 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful