The Wizardique advantage can be found in our caring staff of wizards destined to give you the finest spa experience.

Wizardique wizards are:

  • Level five or higher. We have several wizards capable of casting Mass Exfoliate, but we prefer a more personal touch.
  • Clean, polite, and discreet.
  • Heavily bearded.
  • Always ready with the staff or wand to meet your needs. We keep hundreds of staves, rods, and wands on premises, including artifact and intelligent items!
  • Never surprised by a request. Most of them know what you're going to want before you want it!
  • Never invisible. Other spas stoop to gimmicks. Wizardique relies on quality.
  • Purveyors of only white magic. Your spa treatments will not come with any hidden costs like the death of a pet or the sudden aging of a loved one.

Experience the difference of a Wizardique wizard and you will never be able to take those other spas seriously again.

Wizardique offers a variety of sensual massages performed by our accredited massage wizards. All massages include a free aromatherapy treatment and a visit to one of our six illusory relaxation rooms. Choose from the Cockatrice's Eyre, the Dread King's Tomb, the Pixie Circle, the Shaman's Yurt, the Lair of the Incubus, or the Forest of Despair.

Relaxing Stone Massage
The gentle hands of our wizard masseuse and the penetrating heat of a dragon-blasted stone will fight off the beast within your muscles. Find peace and contemplation. Includes Free 'Shrieks of the Hungry Wight' CD.

Deep Tissue Massage
It begins with a cleansing soak in the waters of the Font of Al'silaar, guaranteed to take d6+1 years off your body. Feeling refreshed, you will be joined by a deep tissue wizard of the Bonded Flesh Cults of the Z'gaar. These mysterious slave wizards can insert whole fingers and hands into your muscles, painlessly, to get to that hidden core of tension. Z'gaar wizards take all you say literally. Do not complain of heart pain, even metaphorically.

The O2 Massage
The elementalist wizards of faraway Rob'eert Z'daar have a saying, 'he who controls the wind, controls the sails.' Direct your mizzenmast toward our O2 Massage specialists if you believe that. These elementalist wizards can shape massaging hands and kneading fingers from the very air itself. Do not inhale during massage.


– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

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