Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
We're getting a new cockpit-focused Star Wars flight game this October! While visions of the classic LucasArts simulators X-Wing and TIE Fighter do barrel rolls in our heads, we should temper our expectations.
Old Games On New TVs: The Original PlayStation + PSIO! (Part 6)
Let's say you have a PlayStation, either because it was already in your closet or because you decided to spend ten thousand dollars for one after the virus arrived. How can you get the most out of the console in 2020?
Is This Version Of SimCity 2000 Real Or Is My Life A Lie?
Are you aware of a SimCity 2000 release that came on A LOT OF FLOPPIES? As in, ten or more 3.5" disks? Because I spent the better part of an afternoon watching my friend install it in the mid 90s. Yet there's no record that this version of the game existed.
Hardware Reviews! HyperX Mouse, Keyboards, Headphones, and Mousepad
The Alloy Origins Core is a tenkeyless mechanical keyboard made of airplane-grade aluminum, which prompts the question: Why don't they make the whole plane out of keyboard?
The Last Of Us 2 Leak: Full Details VERY Real
A newly implemented Vancian magic system requires you to rest after using up your daily allotment of arcane powers.
101 SWITCH GAMES ON ONE CART $10 GREAT VALUE cart may be blank
OH THe games! FINAL FANCY VII: REMARK, JOHN MADEIT FOOTBALL 2021, and THE LEGEND OF ZACHA: BRAFF OH HE WILD all on one cart plus 98 more!
GameStop Employee Memo
Ask each customer if they have Covid-19. If they say no, ask if they would like to pre-order Covid-19. Explain the benefits of pre-ordering. Upsell them on Covid-19 insurance (to protect their Covid-19) and a subscription to Game Informer.
Should You Buy Doom or Animal Crossing?
Animal Crossing: New Horizons. Doom Eternal. March 20th. As a people we have not been faced with a choice of such consequence since... well, ever.
My First Week With Virtual Reality
I always wanted a VR headset but refused to buy a product made by Facebook, or through inaction allow a Facebook product to enter my home. Now I finally own one!
Are You Too Good at Games? Make Them Harder With These Challenges!
For impossible difficulty stand behind your monitor or tv and face the wall.
The Warcraft 3 Reforged Disaster, Xbox Series X's Mystery Hole
Remember the mystery port on the bottom of the SNES? The Xbox Series X mystery port lines up with that one perfectly, allowing the two systems to "scissor" one another.
MiSTer FPGA - Tinker, Tailor, Solder, Sprite (Part 5)
What if MAME was hardware-based with a broader scope? What if the Mega SG required more tinkering but had the potential to run everything up to the Saturn and N64? What if my clunky rhetorical questions painted a decent enough picture of the MiSTer for you to let this paragraph slide?
Review: Every Video Game Ever Made
This critique is so conceptually massive that my patented One Sentence Reviews format cannot contain it. It is so massive, in fact, that I needed two sentences.
EWinRacing Gaming Chair Review and Benchmark
Our first gaming chair review establishes the industry's standard benchmarks: How Many Times I Fell, Chairs Per Second, and Replay Value.
GameCube Christmas Was My Best Christmas
The Nintendo GameCube. Best-looking console ever made. Like my pale and fragile body, every inch of its design screamed, "I was made to play video games!"
Neo Geo Arcade Stick Pro, Darksiders Genesis
Someone must have spilled the beans about my soft spot for the Neo Geo - a spot encompassing my entire body - because SNK sent me their new Arcade Stick Pro.
The Best Game of the 2010s Is John Woo's Stranglehold, From 2007
With 2020 just around the corner everyone's compiling a Best Games of the 2010s list. And they're all wrong. John Woo's Stranglehold (which came out in 2007) is clearly the greatest game of the 2010s.
Analogue's Mega Sg: Tommy Lasorda Never Looked So Good (Part 4)
The Mega Sg is a remarkable console that plays all the classic Genesis games: Tommy Lasorda Baseball, Tommy Lasorda & Earl, Tommy Lasorda Zwei
The Outer Worlds Review
I have used my formidable hacking skills to free a man from a space toilet. Welcome to the future!
Old Games On New TVs: The Original, Huge, Xbox (Part 3)
Replacing the hard drive is basically surgery, which must be performed WHILE THE XBOX IS RUNNING AND ALSO YOU ONLY HAVE FOUR SECONDS TO MAKE THE SWAP
Patch Notes: Untitled Goose Game
Added cheat code "InfiniteGoose" use it for infinite goose okay
You NEED These Weapons to Fully Enjoy Borderlands 3
If you want to get the most out of Borderlands 3, you've got to gear yourself up. Here's our checklist of must-have weapons!
Old Games On New TVs: The Sega Dreamcast (Part 2)
The Sega Dreamcast. Once the sport of kings, now relegated to the Refuse Quarter's sprawling mound of abandoned hoop-and-sticks. How do you get the most out of one today? Do any of its games hold up?
Oops, It's Been Two Months Since Our Last One Sentence Review
Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night - My favorite ritual of the night involves a different kind of stain if you know what I mean... a toothpaste stain, on my shirt, from brushing my teeth too good.
A Video Game Could Definitely Cause Violence
Don't be so hasty to claim that video games can't possibly cause violence. It could happen. But only if the game looked something like this.
Old Games On New TVs: PS2, OSSC, and Retro Gaming Cables (Part 1)
I always felt emulation and a good controller were enough to get the job done. Not just for old games, but for anything. Road repair. Animal husbandry. Hostage negotiations.
Patch Notes: Bloodstained + Super Mario Maker 2
Bloodstained Patch Note: Encountered a bug but didn't have the tool to fix it. Noted the location, continued along another path.
Never Played a Video Game? Here's Everything You Need to Know
Absolutely everything you need to know in one place: How to Level Up Your Elf, How to Be Betrayed, How to Shoot That Guy, How to Kiss the Computer Person, How to Find Objective, and How to Do Critical Hits
E3 2019 Recap-aganza! Fest!
You can be absolutely anyone in Watch Dogs Legion. But you can't wear Aiden Pearce's Iconic Hat, so what's the point?
The PC Game Launcher Trash-Off
There are now more PC game launchers than humans on Earth, only eclipsed by the number of premium streaming video networks.
The Video Game Item Grocery List
Would mind picking up a few things for me while you're out? It's just a handful of pantry staples. I already have the list jotted down for you.
Sonic Movie Trailer, Valve's $1000 VR, One Sentence Reviews
Sonic the Hedgehog should be Speed Racer, the Wachowskis' 2008 film. Not inspired by Speed Racer. Not a remake of Speed Racer. It should simply be Speed Racer.
PlayStation 5: Everything You Need to Know and Some Things You Don't
While the PS5's powerful GPU is capable of pushing graphics to new heights, it comes at the cost of a single shortcoming. The console can only render a maximum of ten rubber ducks in a bathtub at the same time.
The History of the World According to Video Game Promotional Copy
This textbook's entry on the American Frontier (Wild Arms): The Metal Demons, legendary destroyers of Filgaia, are returning. Powerless, the Ancient Guardians call upon three to save their once green world.
Google Stadia Analysis
Google wants to combine the thrills of compression artifacts and input delay with the wonderful world of screeching personality-devoid YouTubers and cold monetization. Will it work?
It's Like You're IN THE GAME!
It's like I'm really looking at bread! No, seriously. THIS LOAF OF BREAD IS HUGE
Anthem Review: Salute Your Shortsightedness
Like Destiny, Anthem is what you get when you smooth out the rough edges that are secretly the best parts of video games, then smooth the remaining formless blob until all that's left is one third of ACTION PRODUCT WITH LEVELING.
ScatterShots: Chronomaster and King's Quest: Mask of Eternity
In this updated version of a classic puzzle, you may only ask one question to all six guards before proceeding. None of them may lie but the only question you get to ask is 'So, uh, do you work out?'
ScatterShots: Alone in the Dark
Welcome to ScatterShots, a new series where I guess what's going on in random screenshots of old games I've never played.
Mad Box: 10x More Powerful Vaporware Than the Phantom
"We're also going to cram this thing full of processor. The largest processor ever created. The processor will be so enormous that you can use it as a dinner plate - if you're a GIANT! Haha."
End of Year Awards + The Most Anticipated Games of 2019
Into the Breach. That's the game of the year. Obviously. This concludes the Game of the Year Awards. Thank you for your time.
2018 Holiday Gift Guide For People You Love, Hate, and Won't Buy a Gift For
If you could solve every problem in life by picking up coins and throwing them at strangers, I wouldn't be in jail at this very moment for throwing coins at strangers from the roof of an Outback Steak House
My Shameful Gaming Confessions
Forgive me, Sid Meier, for I have sinned. I have never finished a 3D Zelda game.
An Absurdly Biased Look at the Neo Geo Mini
For years I daydreamed about owning a Neo Geo of my own. Unfortunately the $600 console and $200 carts were slightly beyond my budget of zero dollars.
Bethesda's Open Letter to Fallout 76 Players
We look forward to seeing you in the game. Maybe one of you can tell us how to change the title screen logo from Gamebryo to Fallout 76.
Some Genius Let Me In Google's Project Stream, And Now I'm Spilling the Beans All Over Your Screen
It only looks weird when you're running through vegetation. Did I mention that about two thirds of Assassin's Creed Odyssey is spent running through vegetation?
The Definitive Morrowind Mod Installation Order
Reinstall the original Better Bodies mod to counteract the Far Worse Bodies mod, making all bodies an ideal 80% worse rather than 100% worse
A Message From Toad
I'm being destroyed by a situation beyond my control! My wife has been very supportive but I can tell that this has shaken her to her core!
Patch Notes: Spider-Man
Tweaked the difficulty of Spider-Man's final boss fight, in which he faces off with The Puddler
After 10 Dang Years Away From World of Warcraft, Here's My Battle for Azeroth Review
After ten years away (How is that possible???) I've come back for the launch of Battle for Azeroth. There's an overwhelmingly positive buzz surrounding the expansion, and it seems like a good excuse to see how much the game has changed in the last decade.
