Zack: Yech. Wolf man, have you be messing with my tarot cards again??
Steve: Wolf man roommate is the worst.
Zack: Stop tearing open the garbage! And what is this, a hex symbol in blood? You know I paid all of the deposit, right?
Steve: Those tarot cards depict how I live my life though dude: skanky babes with big noses, wild wheelies on my midnight hog cruises, death, and druids.
Zack: Only two things are inevitable: death and druids.
Zack: Wait, hang on, I want to go back. You own a motorcycle?
Steve: Does that blow your mind, dude?
Zack: I would be less surprised if you owned a submarine.
Steve: My mom's boyfriend got it for me. It doesn't run so I've got to fix it up.
Zack: Now this is sounding more believable. You have a broken motorcycle in your garage.
Steve: Out back under a tarp actually.
Zack: Do you have any idea how to fix a motorcycle?
Steve: That's what Youtube is for.
Zack: Right on. Let me know when you get your Devils Diciples jacket.
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- The Immortals Handbook: Epic Bestiary
- Steve's Adventure Toolkit: Rad NPC Generator
- The Mind-Blowing Cover Art of Classic D&D
- Steve's Adventure Toolkit: Wicked Encounter Generator
- Palladium's Nightbane (1995)
