The Macabre Fantasy Artwork of Ray O'Bannon (Part 1)

Zack: "Friendzoned again."

Lowtax:: This one's a keeper. I mean, check out his non-jacked up teeth.

Lowtax:: Also his hands are just in semi-prance mode.

Lowtax:: He's clearly got everything going for him.

Zack: "Girls don't want nice skeletons who bring them flowers. They want vampire skeletons who ride motorcycles and carry around fat pistols."

Zack: This is obviously a skeleton that has been dumped.

Lowtax:: "I have developed a failsafe secret method to get any woman to date you, a skeleton with a rose and hood."

Zack: "Where would you be if I walked out that door right this minute and collapsed onto a pile of books?"

Lowtax:: "Envision me turning on a single light bulb. Picture it in your mind. Me pulling the chain down with my 57-jointed finger."

Zack: "What if you could never see me prance again? What if I only pranced with other skeletons? Does that make you jealous?"

Lowtax:: "I would offer you precious jewelry, but..." *motions to other hand, in box, with ring* "I did this for you."

Lowtax:: "I would force you to sit on my lap but I don't know where it is."

Zack: Like most PUA idiots, this skeleton does look like he could be part of a Vegas magic act.

Lowtax:: "Enough of these cloak and dagger games." *takes off cloak and stabs girl with dagger*

Lowtax:: "Looks like game over for you!" *finger turns off light*

Zack: And when he tells his friends about it, he'll say she was a 9 even though clearly she was a 5.

Lowtax:: He's clearly working 9 to 5s.

Zack: *guitar riff*

Lowtax:: *hand falls off*

Zack: *case slams shut*

Lowtax:: *book grows skull*