Tommy Lee Jones is an ex-CIA agent eluding a hitman while trying to get a secret cassette tape to government man Bubba Smith. He leaves it in a concept car called the Black Moon, which is stolen by Linda Hamilton and handed over to a car thievery ring. Sound plausible. But less plausible is the Black Moon itself, which has the curb appeal of a Trapper Keeper packing rocket engines that allow it to drive 300 miles per hour. Topping the 80s factor in this would require a movie about beating the Soviets by doing donuts in a DeLorean around a cube of tube TVs playing Superbowl Shuffle.
Thanks Initial Dave for gleaming the cube on this one.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
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