High school chess phenomenon Billy Prince has an incredible idea!!!

Sorry pal, your dog's a female. It won't work.

Gary Rex, one of the many incompetent cashiers at Home Depot. Here's a picture of him holding a chainsaw, looking for wood. At night he goes to the "boys only" club and looks for wood there too.

One of the South Appleton freakshow students drinks a little of "Yablonski's Magical Elixir" and begins to claw at his puny heart, trying to force the poison out of his stomach. Too bad you braindead simp, antifreeze has a way of staying in your system.

Another South Appleton student after sampling some of "Yablonski's Magical Elixir." Notice the fact that he's not dead. Yet.

There's so many goddamn things wrong with this picture, I don't even know where to begin. I don't even WANT to begin.

Oh what a crazy time at East Appleton Technical Institute! Jacob Meyers lies around naked in bed, drinking beer and reading about "Linux." I never went to college because college is for nancyboys and rich dickheads. Instead I was too busy FIGHTING FOR MY COUNTRY, which is something today's lazy ass shithead kids don't have to worry about, thanks to me. If we had a war, you can bet your sweet ass these morons would be straightened out and you'd see less of those dumb fucking scooters around town. One time I caught a kid pushing one of those scooters and I took the thing and threw it into the trash can and said "NOW THIS JAPANESE CRAP IS NOW WHERE IT SHOULD BE, GODDAMMIT! BUY AMERICAN YOU LITTLE RAT BASTARD!" and then the kid's dad came out of the barber shop so I threw acid in his face and stole his car.